was fought between assyrians and egyptians long before egyptians mated with other races that are more suited to the mild mediterranean climate, and lost their characteristically curly hair that sang “desert” even from a distance. Egyptians, unruly hair untied as is their custom at war, quickly triumphed over the blonde-and-blue-eyed assyrians, who got stir-fryed under the sun on the baking orange desert.

*from The Chronicles of Unexpected Zen Moments, 76:12.